Kissing Lessons

Excerpt: A Novella

by Ben Easton

Copyright © 2009

 

A Flight of Fancy

 

He held the thought in his mind as if it were a piece of dry ice.  He didn’t quite know whether it was colder than cold or burning hot.  Smoke was pouring off it, so he continued to hold it … in his mind.

Dan decided that it wasn’t hurting him, for it was just an idea.  It made him smile. It was a silly, fresh idea, and he almost giggled aloud.  He wanted to try this out, but on whom?

He closed his eyes and imagined putting his plan into action.  It could work.  He just knew it could – maybe not the first time, or the second, but eventually.  He smiled inwardly.

The woman sitting to his left, just an arm’s length away, was a perfect candidate.  Dan had a window seat, and he was busy looking out on the landscape below.  It moved slowly and dreamily under him – under them all.  Cruising at 35,000 feet, northbound from Dallas to Chicago, his view in the twilight hour was quite spectacular.  Velvet stretches of green, patchwork quilts of crops and woods, sharply shored lakes, and glistening rivers.  Any mundane imperfection was filtered out by seven miles of altitude, which also highlighted the fact that the passengers were embraced in a hermetically-sealed cabin of pressurized luxury and seat-belted coziness.

Had his idea been distilled from this artificial familiarity?  Possibly, but more likely it was inspired by the clouds, at least three layers of which fascinated him even as he reflected on his thinking.  Perhaps the soft and friendly cloud formations called out to distant memories of … cotton candy?  Ferris wheels?  Pie-eating contests?

Turning casually to his left, he looked over the empty middle seat, and then beyond the woman whose beauty had certainly contributed to his idea as much as anything else.  She was reading a travel guide, one of several stuffed in her travel bag.  She was oblivious to Dan’s surreptitious examination.

Yes, he thought, she would be a perfect candidate.  He would ask her if she would – - -.

The dry ice in his mind hissed and popped – it made him wince in imagined pain.  His mind had wandered, jumping to a couple of probable conclusions, and … well, “crash and burn” is the label that came to his mind.

Worst case?  His cheek would sting from her loud slap.  His shirt and lap would run red with the wine she would angrily toss at him.  Even if it were just the soul-shriveling shame he’d feel as she shook her head in pitiful derision, turning back to her magazine as if he didn’t exist.

A reality check relieved him: nobody was looking.  His shirt was clean and dry.  His face was untouched.

He looked out the window again, desperately wanting to regain the euphoria of just three minutes before.  What subtle shift had caused him to reconsider his new enterprise?

Judgement, of course.  Burdensome, punishing judgement.

Thank goodness he hadn’t attempted to put his plan into action immediately.  Thank goodness for seat belts.  Aah – the safety of restraint.  Now hold on a minute, Dan thought to himself, the pendulum of his self-esteem rebounding and turning to a positive cycle.  She wouldn’t react that way.  She wouldn’t think that poorly of me.  Look at me, I’m a smart, respectable guy, with the best of intentions.  All I want her to do is give me – - -

Dan spent the next thirty minutes in a festival of doubt.  He had smiled earlier at his fresh and creative notion, but now he was about to ask the flight attendant for a cat-o-nine-tails, so he could really give himself something to worry about.  Two years of post-divorce counseling had obviously not done the trick.

Turning to his pretty neighbor once again, he dared to look directly at her.  When she glanced up, Dan surprised himself by not looking away.  He inclined his head slightly and opened his mouth.  He had no idea what he was getting ready to say.

“I noticed your magazines.  Are you a travel agent, or a travel writer of some sort?”  When she smiled, he gave himself a small pat on the back for not being a complete idiot.

“No, I’m in advertising, working on a travel project.  One of our clients is a hotel chain … looking for a new angle …”  Her eyes were lovely, he thought, and her blouse was of a fabric that was made just for her, the way it was rising and falling as she breathed, and her breasts were …

“Have you ever been to a fair? – like a state fair, where they have all these booths, and tables full of preserves, and giant pumpkins, and such?”

“A fair?!” she asked, her gaze narrowing.

“Ladies and gentlemen,” the overhead speakers blared suddenly, interrupting conversations throughout the aircraft.  The captain continued, “Please return to your seats at this time.  We will begin our descent shortly.”

“Sorry – you were saying?” returned the woman.

“Never mind.  It was a silly idea …” Dan said, trailing off in embarrassment.  The captain’s announcement had saved him from full humiliation; the woman shrugged and returned to her reading.

This flight of fancy had taken him to too many of his darker inner destinations: doubt, fear, even false pride.  Too bad there had been only the one brief stop at playfulness.  Back to the drawing board, he coached himself.

After landing, Dan exited the airplane and made his way toward the gate for his connection.  He had roughly an hour to relax, maybe grab a coffee.

Stretching and walking would recharge him after three hours of sitting, and he was up for one of his favorite pastimes: people watching.  He emerged from his funk as he told his inner critic to take a hike.  Some of that new age “self-talk” he’d been practicing did work.  Maybe he would even try some breath work and meditation, if he could be subtle enough.

Placing his iced coffee carefully on the floor beneath his chair, Dan settled and relaxed.  He was in a less traveled part of the waiting area, and his satchel was strategically propped next to him in order to keep somebody from crowding his space.  With eyes closed, he relaxed and did his best to breathe normally, yet deeply.  He concentrated on the rise and fall of his breath, and he even recited a simple prayer.

This worked, and he melted into the rhythm of his breath.  Dan visualized the waves on a peaceful tropical shore – just as his shrink had recommended.  The waves came in, bringing healing and peace and strength; the waves moved out, releasing tension and problems and sadness.

Thirty minutes later, the chimes from his cell phone timer sounded gently, letting him know it was time to gather his things.  Opening his eyes, he turned off the chimes, and reached for his drink.  He didn’t mind that the ice had all melted.  As he grabbed his belongings, and started toward the line that was building in front of the gate, Dan realized a woman was checking him out.  She, too, was making her way toward the boarding area, and she stood directly behind him.

“Practicing a little meditation, huh?” she asked.

Startled, but maintaining his balance, Dan nodded, “How did you know?”

“Your breathing was too deliberate, and your posture too good, to just be somebody taking a catnap.”

“Very observant,” he said, head turned.  Dan shifted to face the woman more directly, seeing in her eyes a no-nonsense honesty that he found very appealing.  “Yeah, I don’t do it very often, but it sure comes in handy at times like these.”

“Times like these?”

“When I need to recharge my batteries – and shake off demons.”

“Oh.  Did it work?”

“Uh-huh … I was in a bit of a funk, but now I’m back to neutral.”

“Good for you.  I use that technique myself, and it usually brings me good results too.”

“Yeah, the fleeting world of thoughts and emotions …”

The woman seemed content to let the conversation fade.  They both shuffled forward as the boarding line became more crowded and contracted.  Like the other travelers, they looked around, checked their cellphones, and adjusted their belongings.

“Hm … kissing lessons.”

Dan said this almost under his breath, shaking his head back and forth in a pensive fashion.  He had not addressed the woman, but had spoken in the general direction of the tarmac.  Their airplane was visible through the large bank of windows.

“What did you say?”

“Wha’?  Oh … I was just thinking of my crazy idea.  Never mind.”

“Did you say, ‘kissing license’?”

Dan smiled at this bizarre variation of his idea, but shook his head slightly.  What the hell – he might as well just say it.

“Not quite.  I said, ‘kissing lessons.’”  He prepared himself inwardly for some sort of dismissive comment or expression, but none came.  The woman looked up thoughtfully, then back at Dan and smiled.

“Intriguing.”